John Oliver asks Last Week Tonight viewers to select lobster for Trump Supreme Court nominee


John Oliver refuses to assign a Supreme Court dog to the man who’s likely to occupy a stolen seat, opting instead to choose between three lobsters.

Back in 2014, John Oliver decided to create his own version of the US Supreme Court using dogs as replacements for the nine justices as a means to reenact court proceedings using audio from a real case to protest SCOTUS’ ongoing refusal to allow cameras into the courtroom. But after Antonin Scalia passed away last February, Last Week Tonight was forced to retire the bulldog used to represent the conservative justice by allowing viewers to select a stand-in for Obama Supreme Court pick Merrick Garland, eventually choosing Mollie, a miniature Schnauzer, as the best dog to capture the essence of the moderate judge. However, given that Garland was never even given a hearing due to Republican obstruction, Oliver was once again tasked with finding an animal that was suitable for Trump’s recent nominee, Neil Gorsuch, once again turning the decision over to fans at the end of Sunday’s episode.

But first, the host began by mocking Gorsuch’s blandness, referring to him as “aggressively Caucasian,” the “second lead in an erectile dysfunction ad,” and “a white Tim Kaine.” Oliver also took the GOP to task for not allowing a vote for Garland.

“There’s a lot for Democrats to be annoyed about here. Not only is Gorsuch extremely conservative, Republicans basically stole this seat,” he noted. “The debate now is whether to filibuster Gorsuch or confirm a man whose place on the Supreme Court will always have an asterisk on it.”

He then noted that it also puts the show in a “tricky position” because now they have to make another selection for the all-dog Supreme Court. However, Oliver argued that instead, in order to “reflect the fact that Gorsuch’s nomination is a historic aberration, he’ll be getting an animal that will constantly remind us that it has no place in that spot on a dog court,” opting to appoint a lobster in his place.

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“We’re going paws and claws up in this bitch,” he joked.

The options include “Cindy Clawford,” “Pinchers von Shellington III,” and “Mike,” who unlike the other two’s extensive conservative and judicial credentials, is simply a “f*cking lobster.”

Oliver then handed over the decision to America, but cautioned that lobsters can live up to 100 years old, making the lifetime appointment all the more important. He ended by inviting viewers to vote via Twitter, where Mike currently has a clear lead, also creating the hashtag #CLAWANDORDER.

Watch the entire clip below:

Next: John Oliver reacts to Trump’s “meaningless” decision to skip White House Correspondents’ Dinner

Oliver devoted most of Sunday’s Last Week Tonight episode to the topic of the Obamacare repeal, dissecting the Republicans’ various talking points in discussing possible replacements for the increasing popular healthcare law, which they’ve attempted to use at several rowdy town hall meetings across the country attended by ACA supporters.

Last Week Tonight with John Oliver airs Sundays at 11 p.m. on HBO.