Stephen Colbert celebrates Trump's $454 million fine
By Matt Moore
Stephen Colbert's monologue struck a celebratory tone on Monday night as the Late Show host calculated Donald Trump's $454 million fine. It's the latest bit of bad news for the former president that delighted the late-night TV host.
The Late Show with Stephen Colbert was off the air last week, meaning Colbert had to play catch up on Monday night. His monologue couldn't pass up the opportunity to recap Trump's tough day in court that resulted in a $454 million bill.
Colbert appeared absolutely tickled that a New York judge ruled Trump owed $355 million plus back interest that brought the total to $454 million. But the comedian wasn't done with his calculations just yet. He also reminded the audience that every day Trump doesn't pay, the bill goes up by $114,553.04.
"Four more cents! Four more cents!," Colbert chanted along with his studio audience. The Late Show host also found it amusing that Trump cannot run a New York-based business for the foreseeable future.
Trump's immediate efforts to start pulling together a few hundred million dollars also caught Colbert's attention. "Obviously, Trump needs cash fast," Colbert said, "so he's getting into foot stuff."
The setup allowed Colbert to cover Trump's "Never Surrender" sneakers the former president put on sale for $399. "It's like if King Midas touched a turd," Colbert joked.
Digging deeper into Trump's sneakers, Colbert's monologue discovered some more bad news that pleased the host. Trump's sneakers aren't expected to ship until July 2024, and all sales are non-refundable.
"So he's got your money, and if you're lucky, the shoes will never arrive," Colbert quipped. The same delayed delivery also applies to Trump's cologne as the ex-president looks to raise cash quickly.
It will take a lot of sneaker and cologne sales for Trump to scrape together $454 million. Expect the former president to concoct a few more money-making ideas. And when that happens, Stephen Colbert's monologue will surely have something to say.