Stephen Colbert offers ‘newly Jewish’ Paul Ryan a circumcision
By Jeremy Dick
With the recent revelation that Paul Ryan is partially Jewish, Stephen Colbert took to The Late Show to offer the Speaker of the House a circumcision.
Is Paul Ryan going to get cut?
Last night on The Late Show, host Stephen Colbert spoke about what’s been happening with the current Speaker of the House. As Colbert explains, Ryan will be featured on the PBS program Finding Your Roots, with host Henry Louis Gates Jr. At a TV critics meeting, Gates revealed that by digging into Ryan’s past, they discovered him to be 3% Ashkenazi Jewish. And that was something Colbert wasn’t going to let go easily.
“I assumed the most shocking they’d find is that Ryan’s great-grandparents were Eddie Munster and Grover!” Colbert retorts. He goes on to lament how the Jewish community has already “suffered enough” without the likes of adding Ryan to the team. He imagines the Anti-Defamation League shouting, “Run the tests again!!”
To that end, though, Colbert goes the extra mile to present Ryan with a special offer. For a “Bris-Stravaganza” to occur on live TV, Colbert is offering to have Ryan circumcised on the show to honor his newfound Jewish heritage. And, according to Colbert, there’s another way having Ryan get snipped makes total sense. “The foreskin is only one percent of the penis” Colbert explains, “and we know how much you love cuts for the one percent!”
You can watch the Late Show segment in full in the YouTube video below!
Will Ryan take up Colbert’s offer and get snipped live on television? Doesn’t seem very likely to happen, although imagining such an event is pretty amusing. In any case, you can still catch more from Colbert when his show airs every weeknight. The Late Show with Stephen Colbert airs weeknights at 11:35 p.m. EST, only on CBS.